Thinking of Wendall and all that jazz.

Seven years is a long time. Nevertheless, some things remain the same.  Missing Wendall today is much like missing Wendall seven years ago. 

 Yesterday, I realized that we had some things stored in shared memory and those I still have, but there were other bits of knowledge that only one of us was (Or is it one of us were) responsible for remembering, and I have lost those.

 Wendall  was the was our tree identifier. He also knew sizes, types and uses for bolts, screws, nuts and which to use where. He understood crescent wrenches, and torques and sockets. Which tool would work best for a particular job? Ask Wen.

I have needed to look up all this stuff, except the trees, which I don't really care about.

 I, on the other hand, knew where the meds were and ...well, there must be something else, but I can't think of it now. Maybe he was in charge of remembering more than I realized, and he took all that with him. 

So, my fall back tool is a vise grip. I chat a lot with hardware guys. Some know stuff, some don't . At least I learned from Wen to be able to tell the difference.

I continue to think, I will ask Wendall, or I gotta tell Wendall that, or I want Wendall to see, for example---that guy in the McDonald parking lot yesterday dragging stuff from the dumpster to put onto a grocery cart that is invisible under all the stuff that is already there. A red hula hoop rises above it all. I see him later in front of an apartment house sitting on a step. He is organizing his stuff for sale. Wen would have loved that as much as I do. 

Some times, when life gets difficult and I'm not sure I can handle it I think, just for an instant, Wendall will take care of it. 

After a while, one becomes part of a pair and when one of the pair goes, the other is still someone, but not the same as before. It is impossible for me to list all that went missing with Wen.

I'm just beginning to realize how fascinating the dynamics in long term pairs are and what happens after. 

This is not a whine, just commentary. Life goes on, but it will never be the same, and sometimes I long for the sameness, but there is a positive side too.